dont rob me, i dont have anything good

7055 east lake mead blvd #1001
las vegas, nv
89156

i want journals and i want them now! :)

You need to learn how to do this.

human slinky

Red vs Blue QUOTES!!

Now for all of your Caboose Quotes that you want. . .

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Red_vs_Blue

Lyrics for La vie Boheme

ANGEL
Who died?
BENNY
Our Akita
ANGEL, ROGER & COLLINS
Evita
BENNY
You make fun - yet I'm the one
Attempting to do some good
Or do you really want a neighborhood
Where people piss on your
Stoop every night?
Bohemia, Bohemia's
A fallacy in your head
This is Calcutta,
Bohemia is dead
MARK
Dearly beloved we gather here to say our goodbyes
COLLINS & ROGER
Dies irae - dies illa, Kyrie eleison
Yitgadal v'yitkadash
MARK
Here she lies, no one knew her worth
The late great daughter of Mother Earth
On these nights when we
Celebrate the birth
In that little town of Bethlehem
We raise our glass - you bet your ass to -
La vie Boheme
ALL
La vie Boheme
La vie Boheme
La vie Boheme
La vie Boheme
MARK
To days of inspiration
Playing hookey, making
Something out of nothing
The need to express-
To communicate,
To going against the grain,
Going insane, going mad
To loving tension, no pension
To more than one dimension,
To starving for attention,
Hating convention, hating pretension
Not to mention of course,
Hating dear old Mom and Dad
To riding your bike,
Midday past the three-piece suits
To fruits - to no absolutes-
To Absolute - to choice-
To the Village Voice-
To any passing fad
To being an us for once ... instead of a them!!
ALL
La vie Boheme, La vie Boheme
MR. GREY
Ahhemm
MAUREEN
Hey Mister - she's my sister
WAITER
So that's five miso soup, four seaweed salad
Three soy burger dinner, two tofu dog platter
And one pasta with meatless balls
ROGER
Eww
COLLINS
It tastes the same
MIMI
If you close your eyes
WAITER
And thirteen orders of fries
Is that it here?
ALL
Wine and beer!
MIMI & ANGEL
To hand-crafted beers
Made in local breweries
To yoga, to yogurt, to rice and beans and cheese
To leather, to dildoes, to curry vindaloo
To huevos rancheros and Maya Angelou
MAUREEN & COLLINS
Emotion, devotion, to causing a commotion
Creation, vacation
MARK
Mucho masturbation
MAUREEN & COLLINS
Compassion, to fashion, to passion when it's new
COLLINS
To Sontag
ANGEL
To Sondheim
FOUR GIRLS
To anything taboo
COLLINS & ROGER
Ginsberg, Dylan Cunnigham and Cage,
COLLINS
Lenny Bruse
ROGER
Langston Hughes
MAUREEN
To the stage
BOHEMIANS
To Uta. To Buddha. Pablo Neruda, too.
MARK & MIMI
Why Dorothy and Toto went over the rainbow
To blow off Auntie Em
ALL
La vie Boheme
MR. GREY
Sisters?
MAUREEN & JOANNE
We're close
ANGELS & COLLINS
Brothers!
MARK, ANGEL & MIMI
Bisexuals, trisexuals, homo sapiens,
Carcinogens, hallucinogens, men,
Pee Wee Herman
German wine, turpetine, Gertrude Stein
Antoniotti, Bertolucci, Kurosawa
Carmina Burana
ALL
To apathy, to entropy, to empathy, ecstacy
Vaclav Havel - The Sex Pistols, 8BC
To no shame - never playing the Fame Game
COLLINS
To marijuana
ALL
To sodomy, it's between God and me
To S & M
BENNY
Waiter ... Waiter ... Waiter ....... Waiter!
ALL
La vie Boheme
COLLINS
In honor of the death of Bohemia an impromptu salon
will commence immediately following dinner ...
Maureen Johnson, just
back from her spectacular one-night engagement at the eleventh street lot,
will perform Native American tribal chants
backwards through her vocoder, while accompanying herself on the electric cello -
which she ain't never studied.
ROGER
And Mark Cohen will preview his new documentary about his inability
to hold an erection on the high holy days.
MARK
And Mimi Marquez, clad only in bubble wrap,
will perform her famous lawn chair-handcuff dance to the sounds of iced tea
being stirred.
And Roger will attempt to write a bittersweet, evocative song.
That doesn't remind us of "Musetta's Waltz!"
COLLINS
Angel Dumott Schunard will model the latest fall fashions
from Paris while accompanying herself on the 10 gallon plastic pickle tub.
ANGEL
And Collins will recount his exploits as anarchist -
including the tale of the successful reprogramming of the M.I.T.
virtual reality equipment to self-destruct, as it broadcasts the words
ALL
"Actual reality - Act Up - Fight AIDS"
MIMI
Excuse me - did I do something wrong?
I get invited - then ignored all night long
ROGER
I've been trying - I'm not lying
No one's perfect. I've got baggage
MIMI
Life's too short, babe, time is flying
I'm looking for baggage that goes with mine
ROGER
I should tell you
MIMI
I got baggage too
ROGER
I should tell you
ROGER & MIMI
Baggage
ALL
Wine and beer!
MIMI
AZT break
ROGER
You?
MIMI
Me. You?
ROGER
Mimi

i'm sick

alicia woke up sick today
alicia cant breathe
alicia feels like poo

adam, you are no longer allowed to watch movies alone, especially ones that have anyone dying because we all know you arent allowed to die anyway.Even if you did die, i would just say a whole mess of things that no one would understand anyway, then i would yell at you for dying, scaring everyone else in the room. No way youre winning the race.

RENT

That show is always worth watching, La Vive Boheme is always up on my favorite musical moments list however Angel's funeral always makes me think. Pretty much any funeral scene where people start talking about the dead person. We all know that they're not going to say anything bad, but there deffinatley is a difference between "He was . . . nice. . . " and what Angel gets in Rent.

It makes me wonder. Besides the other owner of this blog, would anyone have anything to say about me? If there is another person out there that could honestly say something besides, "He was. . . nice" what would they even say? This is why I'm not allowed to watch or read anything dealing with death, because I get all morbid.

"I was going to this warm bright light, and I saw Angel. . . AND SHE LOOKED GOOD!"

Movies like this make me think too much and that's never a good thing.

By the way, this youtube clip will be showed to Robert, and I don't plan on explaining a single point that he doesn't understand, like Jo-anne or Angel. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SPxtv3KW9A I always liked that song, but with that video it's tempting to make that my theme song.

Once upon a time. . .

One upon a time I had a brother in law who wrote a book.

This book was a text book and cost losts of monies to buy.

This book nomrally cost 130 dollars, but then got discounted down to 80.

Then along came a woman who bought 3 coppies. That's right, 3. One for herself, one for her best friend, and then one for her son. (that's $240 worth of books)

http://www.amazon.com/Badiou-Marion-Paul-Continental-Philosophy/dp/0826498701/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1198782115&sr=8-1

That's right. My mom who is trying to pull off this whole 'frugal' thing, just got 3 of those books.

This only gives me hope in the lines of me getting 3 coppies of my book (when it gets published) sold.

Swedish Tradition

Okay, so every Christmas every family watches a Disney christmas presentation, and it's the same every year. This is my favorite.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zEFUXYgU67k

grrrrr!

ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!

UGH!

so are you still coming over? or are they going to ban you from hanging out with me, so stupid!!!

i liked my status as the pity friend, now it is being revoked, i never got the memo, i never authorized this change!

Hey Ya!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjzkFOA1mhM

WARNING: Alicia, I just told my parents that I'd be comign over to watch a show and my mom has changed her mind about you. You are now back on the 'I think she has feelings for you' list. You've dropped back to your old location where she thinks that you're trying to steal me away instead of trying to just hang out with me because you're my pity friend.


Edit: This just in: "Just beware that she really likes you" -mom
directly followed by my dad- "Alot"

They then tag teamed on me and started asking if I was 'serious' with you, and how that girls are different than boys and that I need to be careful around you because you're just trying to get married, loose your life, and have millions of kids.

Well, maybe not that last part, but you get the drift of it.

Just thought you'd like to know.

Here

http://www.slsknet.org/

download the most recent version, search for whatever you want, and join me in the glowsticking.com room

you thought your christmas was bad...

ok so here's me and mom's attempt at a gingerbread house, you will notice that one side of the roof is off center and the rather large mess around the house, lets just say by the end of these whole thing, i had frosting in my hair and i never want to do this again.



These are my two gingerbread people, they live in this condemned home, and you can see where the green peppermint is covering the large hole in the roof

thought you would enjoy :)

just because its christmas

Here's a laugh for Christmas :)

Waist deep in a pile of . . .

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

For all of those that don't know this inside joke, don't worry, you're not meant to know.

Crazy News

I just did the math, even if I don't take the final, and I don't turn in the revised paper for my final class, I'll still squeak by with a 70%!

Knowing that no matter what you're going to pass a class, makes the final a whole lot less stressful.

See you in a few.

Reasons #412-416 for Why You Shouldn't Let Me Own A Computer and an Internet Connection

And a link just for the kicks and giggles of this all to round us out in our laughing hysteria. http://www.berro.com/entertainment/bumper.htm

ALL HAIL THE CHEF!

i love this

It's a classic

In hopes of making your day happier and brighter

Okay, that video made me angry, so I needed something to make me funny. You don't have to watch all of it, but it sure makes me laugh.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=22069116663887328

I'll kill someone

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=4816055229487356909
I will kill someone

This got sent to me.

I watched the first 5 minutes and now I just want to throw my fist through a wall.

I'll say this right now, if anyone watches this and has and has questions. Please have an open mind, and be willing to talk to me. This is not true.

Quick clarification: Notice that these are 'former' members. They're former because they get kicked out the second they do any of the things that these people are claiming we do. Also, notice that the 'active' members of the church that they talk about are talking about the 'fundamentalist' church. That's like interviewing only the fundamental Muslims, and saying that all Muslims are like that. They are not members, they are not allowed to do this.

Tee Shirts That You Wish You Had

http://www.bustedtees.com/

so you can have some fun in the dungeon

dedicated to the guys yesterday...

and just because it is amazing...

WE RULE THE WORLD!!!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well now that just sucks. In hopes that your life gets a little better, I've also attached a few good pictures in hopes of making your weekend a little happier and brighter.

stupid college and their stupid grades

i got a D in my math class :(

COBERT!!

Cobert. . .
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-869183917758574879

Then just for kicks and giggles, a random little video that I ran across. . .
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3163263343187879320

Then I talked about this, so here's an hour long video of the entire season one of Red Vs. Blue Enjoy.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2509698022758661335

ORLY?

my job = great photos

This poor kid, didnt even know he was the next victim, but he does have some mad skillz (thats right, its with a 'z') because he falls asleep in the weirdest places and positions





And as promised, the crazy things that happen at my job way too early in the morning


Thats right, its Santa Hood, Play on playa, Play on...

dun dun DUN!!!

In case you forget how...

you better learn or this is soooo over!!!

i found a new one!

I dont know how this fun websites find me, ok well this one jocelyn gave to me, so there, but still its the principal. This should provide atleast 45 seconds of entertainment :) Enjoy


http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1203011927


And as for EDC, exciting! that is now going to be put in my planner, in ink, so its permanent, lets start planning :)It can be our anniversary trip, lol

After a sucky day, this is well deserved

By the way, EDC is June 28th. Close to our anniversary 8-}

Big Red Button

I couldn't resist when I saw the picture

As soon as I saw that picture I knew that it had to become a poster, so I did my civic duty and made this one.

Other images

SNOW!!! Too bad that it's all melted now days, but still, it's SNOW!
So . . . during Thanksgiving we were playing Uno . . . BUT WE WERE ALSO COMPETING IN THE ANUAL WALTERS FAMILY THANKSGIVING OLYMPICS. With a write in competitor in the book balancing competition, with a winning time of one hour long.

What Spencer And Tamara Do When No One's Looking

this is how i feel at this very moment

The other fat kids...

So I typed in our adress wrong and I got this....

http://fatkidsquared.blogpsot.com/

it's scary

grrr...

they changed the chairs in the computer lab from comfy broken-in chairs to these hard uncomfortable chairs. I think they are trying to tell us something...

A to do list of sorts . . .

http://www.bangitout.com/articles/viewarticle.php?a=1205
http://www.geekbb.com/showthread.php?t=267
http://www.prosoundweb.com/fun/jokes/joke32.shtml
http://ca.answers.yahoo.com/answers2/frontend.php/question?qid=20071030001520AAcQVzg&show=7

I found an amazing website...

Make your own poster whenever you feel like it
http://diy.despair.com/motivator.php

Our Heroes

Walters 1

Adam Walters

English Language 223

Cynthia Hallen

November 27, 2007

Analysis of Phoebe Cary’s poem, Our Heroes

Through analysis of the poem Our Heroes by Phoebe Cary one can find more meaning and enjoyment of the poem. Analysis of the phonemic patterns in the poem can help one find more of the use of internal rhyming and appreciate the poetic talent that is in this poem, analysis of the semantics of the poem can help one find the basic meaning of the poem, and finally the analysis of the sense of the words that Cary chooses to use in the poem can help one understand a deeper meaning of the poem that can not be seen at first glance.

The phonemic transcription of Our Heroes can help the reader see the rhyme scheme and patterns that occur within the poem. Not only can one see the rhyme scheme through the phonemic transcription, but one can also find interesting internal rhymes. The phonemic translation of Our Heroes is as follows.

/hirz ə hænd tu ðə bXґ hu hæz krґĵ

tu du wΛt hi nouz tu bi raґt

wεn hi falz ґn ðə weґ əv tεmpteґšən

hi hæz ə hard bædļ tu faґt

hu straґvz əgεnst sεlf ņ hґz kamrædz

wґl faґnd ə moust paXwXfļ fou

Walters 2

al anŗ tu hґm ґf hi kankŗz

ə čir fŗ ðu bXґ hu sεz nou

ðεrz mεni ə bædl fat deґli

ðə wərld nouz nəθing əbæut

ðεrz meni a breґv lґdl səljr

huz strengθ pXts ə liĵən tu ræut

ņ hi hu faits sґn singl hændəd

ґz mor əv ə hiro aґ se

ðæn hi hu lidz səljrz tu bædl

ņ kankrs baґ armz ґn ðə freґ

bi stεdfæst maґ bXґ wεn yr tεmptəd

tu du wət yu nou tu bi raґt

stænd frm bai ðə kəŗs əv mænhXd

ņ yu wґl orkəm ґn ðə faґt

ðə raґt bi yr bædl kraґ εvŗ

ґn weĵing ðə worfer əv laґf

ņ gad hu noz hu r ðə hiroz

wґl gґv yu ðə streґngθ fr ðə straґf /

With the phonemic transcription one can find the rhyme scheme of the poem much easier. The rhyme scheme for each stanza of the poem is abcbdefe. This is visible with the phonemic transcription where one can see that between lines six and eight the words

Walters 3

‘foe’ and ‘no’ become transcribed to /fou/ and /nou/. The rhyme scheme is not that difficult to be seen without the phonemic transcription however there are many things that are only seen through the phonemic transcription.

Through the transcription more than just the rhyme scheme can be seen. One can see the repetition of a single sound in the beginning of the second stanza, in the first three lines, lines nine through eleven. The /ð/ sound is repeated three times with /ðεrz/, /ðə/, and /ðεrz/. One aspect of the phonemics in Our Heroes that is harder to notice without the phonemic transcription is the internal rhyme of the poem. In line nine there is an internal rhyme between the words /mεni/ and /deґli/. This internal rhyme puts the /i/ sound on the unstressed syllables in the line, which adds not only to the beat and tempo of that line but also to the entire poem. The use of internal rhyme is also used in the following lines; line one; / hænd/ and /hæz/, line two; /tu/ and /tu/, line four; /hæz/ and / bædļ/, line six; /moust/ and /fou/, line seven; /anŗ/ and /kankŗz/, line fourteen; /əv/ and /ə/, line fifteen; /hi/ and /lidz/, line sixteen; /kankrs/ and /armz/, line seventeen; /stεdfæst/ and /tεmptəd/ line eighteen; /tu/, /du/, and /tu/, line nineteen; /stænd/ and /mæn/ in /mænhXd/, line twenty; /wґl/ and /ґn/, line twenty-one; /raґt/ and /kraґ/, line twenty-two; /hu/ and /hu/, and line twenty-three /ðə/ and /ðə/. This extensive usage of internal rhyme keeps a steady rhythm and connects the lines together with more than the simple rhyme scheme that is used. Most people assume that rhyming only occurs at the end of the lines in a poem; however through the phonemic transcription of Our Heroes we can see that there is more than end rhymes in this poem.

Walters 4

Analyzing the semantic aspects of Our Heroes can help one understand the simple meanings of the poem. In this poem Cary uses grammatical ambiguity to uncover a possible meaning of the poem. In the opening sentence of the poem, Cary says who the poem is for, “to the boy who has courage to do what he knows to be right”. However in the poem there are instances where the subject is not obviously this boy. One such instance is in the second stanza, starting with the second sentence,

“Stand firm by the colors of manhood, and you will o’ercome in the fight. “The right,” be your battle cry ever in waging the warfare of life, and God, who knows who are the heroes, will give you the strength for the strife”.

The first sentence is put in the directive form; Cary is commanding someone to “stand firm” however there is no subject in that sentence leaving the reader to guess who the subject of the command is.

The use of the pronoun ‘he’ is also an ambiguous word that adds to the ambiguity of the poem. The word ‘he’ can refer to the boy or ‘he’ can refer to a generic person. The possibility of two subjects in the poem presents an interesting problem; the subject could be the boy, or the reader. If it is the boy, the poem is interpreted as a poem encouraging him onward giving him words of wisdom, however if the subject becomes the reader the poem is interpreted as a poem of inspiration and motivation. The possibility of Cary addressing the reader, and giving advice directly to them makes this poem much more personal. With the subject missing from these sentences as well as others in the poem make this poem easier to personalize with. Therefore one possible way to interpret this poem is not just as a “cheer for the boy who says no” but also a cheer for the reader who

Walters 5

says no, or the reader who is currently fighting a battle that “the world knows nothing about”. This poem at first glance seems to be addressed to “the boy who has courage” but it can also be addressed to the reader.

One grammatically ambiguous sentence that causes a large misunderstanding is the first sentence in the third stanza “Be steadfast, my boy, when you’re tempted, to do what you know to be right.” This sentence, when studied, shows that the boy needs to be steadfast when tempted. However the phrase “to do what you know to be right” can modify the word “temptation” which changes the meaning of the sentence. Instead of the boy being strong when temptations to do bad come into his life, with this ambiguity the meaning becomes the boy needs to be strong when tempted to do the right, as if he should be trying to not do the right. This drastically changes the meaning of the entire poem in one line. The ambiguity changes the poem from a support to those who choose to do right to a support for those that choose to not do the right.

Cary uses synonyms to tie together her poem. Many words in Our Heroes are synonymous for other words within the poem. Words such as battle, fight, and strife, are synonyms of each other and through this tie together the idea that self control is a fight to fight and nothing less. The use of synonyms also allows for a slightly broader sense of what Cary is describing. If Cary had only used the word ‘fight’ throughout the poem, the poem would not have the same meaning. The sense of ‘fight’ is limited to,

“to contend in battle or single combat . . . to contend, strive for victory, struggle, engage in conflict . . . to struggle for freedom or mastery . . . to strive with for mastery . . . to fight up against: to struggle against . . . to clash or jar with”.

Walters 6

This definition is not enough to portray the meaning that Cary wants to give, because it has a major tie to a physical fight. However through synonyms Cary is able to convey that this personal struggle is more than a fight of physical grandeur but one of mental power.

One aspect of semantics that Cary uses is presupposition. Many statements in the poem presuppose something about the subject of the poem and what they have done. One presupposition is found in the first sentence. The sentence says that the boy has courage to do what is right, however it supposes that it takes courage to do the right. Cary does not take into consideration that some people do what is right because it is lawful and they do not want to get into legal trouble or even those that do right because they are afraid to loose support from their friends and family. The fight that Cary discusses very quickly looses its’ courageous appeal when the boy does what is right because his mom told him to. This can help us understand the poem a bit better because it assumes that it is our choice to fight, that we should be self motivated in our own lives.

Another presupposition is in line three, “When he falls in the way of temptation”. This presupposition assumes that this boy will fail and will fall into temptation. There are no other options, there isn’t the option of avoiding the temptation or protecting oneself from the temptation, but it is presupposed that there is failure.

The major presupposition in the entire poem is intertwined with Cary cheering the boy on. Does the boy even want to fight? This entire poem assumes that this boy wants to fight this battle of self control. Never is the subject given any other option besides fighting. Every line of this poem hangs on the fact that the boy wants to fight, if the boy

Walters 7

ever wanted to give up or simply did not feel like working on this eternal fight, the poem would be useless as a form of support or inspiration. Through this presupposition of Cary’s that the boy is fighting, the reader can learn that this fight is a subject that Cary thinks is worth fighting for, that there are no other options besides fighting for the right at all costs. Through analysis of the semantics used by Cary one can find ambiguous structures, presuppositions, and synonyms which can all be used to help understand the meaning of the poem.

Through analysis of the sense of the words that Cary chooses to use in Our Heroes a deeper meaning or possibly even a new meaning can be found in the poem. Certain words in the poem are words that most people would not use, but through analysis these words add meaning to the poem. One such word is in line twelve, which is as follows “who’s strength puts a legion to rout”. The word ‘rout’ is not a frequently used word. One can guess at the meaning using context clues. Cary is showing how that one boy that says no is stronger than an entire army, so one can assume that putting a legion ‘to rout’ must be a powerful thing to do, something that a normal army would not be able to do. However, with the definition of ‘rout’ being,

“A disorderly, tumultuous, or disreputable crowd of persons. . . an assemblage of three or more persons proceeding to commit an unlawful act. . . the whole number of persons constituting a certain (disreputable) class. . . common or vulgar. . . riot, disturbance, stir, uproar”

a new meaning comes forward. To rout means more than what an educated guess can get close to. To rout a legion means that a single boy with the strength to say no could cause

Walters 8

an entire legion of people turn into a mob. Cary gives the stalwart man enough strength to affect hundreds of people, showing just how much inner strength and power it must take to say no to ones self. This meaning within the poem can only be learned through lexicographical research into the words that are used.

Another word that at first glance gains a negative connotation is ‘comrades’. At first the reader instantly thinks of communist Russia with everyone calling everyone else comrade. This skews the meaning of the poem if viewed this way. The poem about personal strength and the power it takes to control oneself is suddenly disrupted by the images of a hammer and sickle and ruin the poem’s imagery for a split second. The definition of comrade helps fix this misunderstanding,

“One who shares the same room, a chamber-fellow, ‘chum’; esp. among soldiers, a tent-fellow, fellow-soldier (also comrade-in-arms); hence gen., an associate in friendship, occupation, fortunes, etc., a close companion, mate, fellow”.

This helps show that a comrade is more than just a member of a socialist society, but also a peer, colleague, or friend. Without the lexical analysis of ‘comrade’ there is a possibility that a reader could misinterpret the poem, and interpret a tainted meaning from the poem.

There are a few words that have multiple meanings and depending on which way you choose to describe the word, the poem changes it’s meaning subtly. One of these words that has multiple meanings is ‘battle’. Battle can mean, “A hostile engagement or encounter between opposing forces on land or sea” or it can also mean, “Strife, conflict, contest, struggle for victory”. This changes the meaning of the poem in lines four, nine,

Walters 9

fifteen, and twenty-one where the word battle occurs. Depending on which definition the reader decides to use battle can mean that there is a war involving conflicting armies at hand, or the word battle can mean a something as small as an internal conflict. I personally would interpret the poem as using the second definition where the word battle is meant to portray any sort of conflict, wither it be large or small. Another word that has multiple definitions is ‘brave’. Brave can be defined as, “Courageous, daring, intrepid, stout-hearted” or can simply be defined as “a general epithet of admiration or praise: Worth, excellent, good, ‘capital’, ‘fine’, ‘famous’”. With the first definition the word brave in line eleven creates the idea that the boy who says no is a courageous man as brave as any soldier or man alive. However with the second definition the same line makes out the solitary boy to be simply a good person. Both options praise the young man that says no, however one creates the idea that the boy is a courageous man that is doing a noble act, while the other definition is simply showing the boy to be good kid. My opinion is that the poem is better interpreted by the first definition which praises the young boy who says no against the temptations that he faces. Another word that has multiple meanings is the word fight. To fight is defined as, “to contend in battle or single combat,” a description which describes the war aspect of a fight. This is the first term in the dictionary and the term that people generally think of when the word fight is said. This definition of a fight being a battle or single combat is not the only definition; there is another definition, “to strive with for master . . . to struggle against (something of overwhelming power)”. This alternate definition of fight fits better in the poem. When fight is interpreted this way the fight that the “brave little soldier” must wage is no longer

Walters 10

a physical war, it is instead a war of mastery of ones self. The war goes from being a war of guns and violence to a war of emotions and internal conflict. Through analysis of these words a deeper meaning is found in the poem, and a deeper sense of admiration for the boy in the poem is found.

When analyzed linguistically Our Heroes becomes a more meaningful poem. Through analysis one can uncover the art of poetry through phonemic transcriptions, simple meaning through semantic analysis, and deeper meaning of the poem through lexicographical analysis. When used together these three aspects of linguistic analysis add to Our Heroes by Phoebe Cary.

A Disabled Cathedral

Walters 1

Adam Walters

English 230

Bruce Jorgensen

November 29, 2007

A Disabled Cathedral

In the short story Cathedral by Raymond Carver the characters have two sorts of disabilities; social, and emotional. These two types of disabilities are shown through the beginning of the story, but are also given a solution through the actions that occur throughout the story. A disability is described by the Marriam-Webster dictionary as,

“1 a: the condition of being disabled b: inability to pursue an occupation because of a physical or mental impairment; also : a program providing financial support to one affected by disability . . . 2: lack of legal qualification to do something3: a disqualification, restriction, or disadvantage”.

With this description in mind one can see that a disability can be more than just a physical “impairment” but can also be a mental condition which stops a person from doing something at an average level. A disability can even be considered as general as a “restriction, or disadvantage”. With this definition of what a disability is, one is able to find that there are social, emotional and physical disabilities are addressed and given a solution to in Cathedral.

One disability that exits in Cathedral is a social disability of the husband. This social disability is that the husband does not want to work in a social setting, he would rather be on his own instead of being near anyone. The husband has a difficult time with

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any social interaction with Robert, the blind man, or even his own wife. He does not show support to his wife or Robert through social ties. The husband would prefer to live single and alone if the option was given to him. This can be seen in a few different places in Cathedral. One instance where the husband would prefer to be alone is when he is first introducing the idea of Robert being blind, his wife helping Robert, and the relationship that Robert and the wife have together. In reference to Robert visiting his house the husband says, “I wasn’t enthusiastic about his visit. He was no one I knew. And his being blind bothered me. . . A blind man in my house was not something I looked forward to” (273). Another instance where the husband shows his disability of wanting to be completely alone in life is when the wife brings in a tape from Robert and they listen to a segment from the tape. The husband becomes uncomfortable from when Robert says his name on the tape, “I heard my own name in the mouth of this stranger, this blind man I didn’t even know” (274). The husband and wife then get interrupted and do not go back to the tape, but his opinion about that was “maybe it was just as well. I’d heard all I wanted to” (274). He shows through this that he does not want contact with anyone else or does he want anyone to make contact with him. This social disability is also shown when he is talking to his wife while they are trying to plan out when Robert comes to visit, what they will do. The husband suggests “Maybe I could take him bowling” (274) but the wife does not agree with that idea, and then she says to her husband, “If you had a friend, any friend, and the friend came to visit, I’d make him feel comfortable,” (274) he responds by secretly stating and admitting to his own disability, “I don’t have any blind friends,” but then just to make sure that we are all quite sure of his social disability his

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wife repeats what he says with emphases making sure that everyone knows what one of his disabilities is, “You don’t have any friends” (275). The next scene where the husband shows his disability is after a nice dinner when Robert and the wife start to talk with each other. Instantly the husband again shows his social disability and does not pay attention to what they are saying because that would force him to start paying attention to someone else’s life, he tries to be social and add to the conversation, but “when I thought he was beginning to run down, I got up and turned on the TV” (279). During the middle of a conversation between two people that have been friends for roughly ten years, who are trying to catch up on the old times, the husband decides that he is going to stand up and turn on the television. For him it is a way to separate himself from the conversation going on around him. By turning on the television the conversation to slows down to a grinding halt, letting the husband be alone even though he is sitting with two people that are best friends. This want to be alone is a disability because it separates the husband from everyone around him. He is unable to get any normal social interaction with those around him, which disables him from being able to live a normal social life. In his mind this is not a disability, it is simply how he lives his life; however the desire to be alone constantly is truly a “disadvantage” especially to those that are unfortunate enough to find themselves in a social situation with him, which fits into the definition of a disability.

The social disabilities of the husband does not just stop at wanting to be alone; he also has the social disability of not thinking before he says things, or purposefully saying things that are offensive. This can be considered a disability because it hinders him from

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being able to make any social interactions. An example of this disability is when the husband is first told that Robert would be coming to visit. The husband knows that Robert was blind and needed help to do even some of the smallest things like reading, however the husband offers to his wife, “maybe I could take him bowling” (274). The husband also opens his mouth and is offensive towards others when he finds out that Robert’s deceased wife was named Beulah. The first question out of his mouth was, “Was his wife a Negro?” (275). This statement possibly could be considered a simple questions of wanting to know if Beulah was African American or not, but the use of “Negro” and then also the wife’s response of, “Are you crazy? Have you just flipped or something? What’s wrong with you? Are you drunk?” (275) shows that this was not asked in a tactful manner. When the husband talks to Robert his disability of being unable to think before he speaks only becomes worse. After just meeting Robert, the husband asks, “Did you have a good train ride? Which side of the train did you sit on, by the way?” (276). Again the wife shows that this is not a tactful question to ask by saying, “What a question, which side! What’s it matter which side?” (276). One of the other offensive action that the husband does is not an action of offense, it is instead the lack of action that causes offense. Near the end of the short story the husband draws a cathedral with Robert. The wife wakes up and sees what it is that they are doing and asks, “What are you doing? Tell me, I want to know” (285) but the husband says nothing. Just as offensive as it is to speak, this is an example of how offensive it can be to say nothing. The husband was asked a direct question, but he decides to revert not only to his first social disability of wanting to be left alone, but he also is offensive in not respecting his

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own wife and answering her. This offensive behavior is a social disability because it restricts and disadvantages the husband in his interactions with those around him. Those that are around him do not trust him, and possibly do not want to even interact with him because of his offensive behavior, which makes this problem a social disability.

The wife shows also has a social disability. Her social disability is found in the introduction that the husband gives about her. He describes her life, what she has done, and her marriage to the air force officer. Her disability does not come from the fact that she wants less people in her life; her disability comes from not having enough. The wife and her first husband at the time were moving from air force base to air force base, and finally she had enough,

“One night she got to feeling lonely and cut off from people she kept losing in that moving-around life. She got to feeling she couldn’t go it another step. She went in and swallowed all the pills and capsules in the medicine chest and washed them down with a bottle of gin. Then she got into a hot bath and passed out” (274).

This happened because the wife was continually moving from one place to another. This constant movement made it so that the wife was unable to have a secure and set social group. From this lack of a social group and the lack of interaction with those that she wanted to interact with, the wife acted out against what was going on by trying to commit suicide.

The wife can be seen to want to keep the social connections and social networks that she gains, which is also her second disability. The desire to want to keep the

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relationships that she has can be seen as a disability because she is unable to allow people to move out of her life. The disability of not letting people leave her life can be seen with the wife’s relationship with Robert. Their relationship was started ten years previous to the story; however she tried during that time to keep the relationship there. Robert and the wife met while she was trying to help Robert live his life. Their relationship was based off of the fact that she would, “read stuff to him” and “help him organize his little office” and through that simple work relationship they “became good friends” (273). Once the wife and Robert became friends, the wife decided that she could to keep that social relationship, even after a year of separation. Even after the wife had “married her childhood sweetheart” and “moved away from Seattle” the wife took the first steps to keep in touch with Robert. “She made the first contact after a year or so. She called him up one night from an air force base in Alabama. She wanted to talk” (273). The relationship was over a year old, and yet she still wanted to have contact with this man. It is not that normal for a person after only working for a person for a summer, after a year of not having contact with their employer to call them up, just “to talk”. This is a disability because it makes it so that the wife is unable to sever ties with people that she becomes friends with. If anyone becomes her friend, in her mind they become her friend for life, and that can be a dangerous thing to play around with. There is only one instance where the wife decides to break a social relationship that she has previously made, and that was with her first husband. However, she breaks this social relationship with her disability in mind. While married to a member of the air force, she was unable to gain the social interaction that she wanted. With this dilemma she divorced her first husband and

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was able to reenter the social scene, where she was able to meet her second husband. This social disability is also a problem because she is unable to cut ties with her second husband. The husband is not caring or loving to his wife in this story. The husband openly mocks her relationship with Robert, mocks her poetry, and argues with her multiple times throughout Cathedral. This is not a relationship that is based on love because the way that the husband acts is not in a loving fashion. However the wife’s disability stops her from divorcing her second husband because while with her second husband both the first and second social disability that she has can be solved. The first social disability of wanting a concrete social circle to interact with is provided and the second disability of being unable to allow people to leave her social circle is also met.

While social disabilities deal more with the social problems of the characters and how they interact with the world around them, emotional disabilities are problems of the mind that affect the individual. One emotional disability is that the husband considers his offensive behavior, one of his social disabilities, to be laughable. When Robert, the wife and him all sit down to eat dinner he says, “Now let us pray” (278) and watches as Robert bows his head ready to pray. The husband has no intentions of praying. Instead of praying the husband jokingly says, “Pray the phone won’t ring and the food doesn’t get cold,” (278) which is an insult to Robert who has taken the steps to get ready for a real prayer. This could be interpreted as being humorous however that is an offensive move playing around with a guest in that fashion. This is an emotional disability because the husband condones his inappropriate behavior by creating a joke about it. This disability of accepting offensive remarks and actions as socially acceptable is also seen when the

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husband says that he will take Robert out bowling. The husband is being offensive to Robert and his physical disability but accepts it as nothing socially wrong because he said that line as a joke. The husband does have an emotional disability because he mentally does not see the difference between an offensive comment and a joke, but instead only sees humor in what he says that is offensive.

These disabilities are all solved through the arrival and interaction with Robert. The husband’s disability of not wanting to be around other people is fixed with the arrival of Robert. The husband is with Robert, and as much as the husband tries to get Robert to move away socially, Robert persists and forces the husband into a social situation. The wife after a bit of time leaves the living room leaving Robert and the husband together, alone. This is exactly what the husband does not want. This goes against the husband’s disability however Robert through his interaction with the husband is slowly able to get the husband to start talking and even create a relationship with Robert. The first time that Robert and the husband start to hold a conversation and really start to learn about each other is when Robert is asked “What’s your pleasure?” (277) and the husband mixes the drinks that they want. Through getting him a drink, Robert opens up and starts talking about himself, how that he thinks that “When I drink water . . . I drink water. When I drink whiskey, I drink whiskey” (277). It’s a small act by Robert to break the separation between him and the husband, but it is the beginning of their relationship where the husband starts to learn small little facts about Robert’s personal life. The next time that the husband learns more about Robert’s life and does not reject it or flop out about what he learns is when Robert is asked about if he owns a TV or not. Robert responds, “My

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dear, I have two TVs. I have a color set and a black-and-white thing, and old relic” (279). The husband’s response is the first time that he has had nothing to say, which is an improvement on his normal sarcasm, “I didn’t know what to say to that. I had absolutely nothing to say to that. No opinion” (279). This is the beginning of the husband starting to think and act differently instead of hating being around other people. This can be shown by the next time that the husband and Robert interact because the husband is the one to initiate being friendly. The husband asks Robert “if he wanted to smoke some dope with me” (279). This is the first kind thing that the husband has done the entire short story. The husband continues with these kind acts towards Robert including trying to explain to him what is going on while they watch television, to drawing a cathedral while Robert holds his hand. Through Robert interacting with the husband, the social disability that the husband once had begins to fade away.

The husband’s second disability of being offensive and not thinking about what he is saying to those that are around him, is also cured by the arrival and interaction with Robert. While watching the television Robert begins to ask the husband questions about what is going on, on the television program and how it looks. Instead of being offensive Robert tries his best to answer what a cathedral looks like. The husband is forced to think about what he says and choose his words. At first the husband begins describing them as “very tall” (283) but realizes that with that description it doesn’t help out much. The husband tries again and says, “They reach way up. Up and up. Toward the sky. They’re so big, some of them, they have to have these supports” (283) which is a much more

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meaningful than just saying that cathedrals are “very tall”. This cures the husband of his second disability because he has to help and even work with Robert.

Robert’s arrival also helps out the wife with her disabilities. Her first social disability of needing interaction with others is cured with the simple interaction of eating dinner and talking with Robert. She is able to relax and receive the social contact that she needs which cures her social disability. Not only does she receive the interaction that she wants, but it is interaction with a friend of hers, which solves the second disability of hers, the inability to let go. She is able to get what she wants from her disability with the interaction of Robert. The wife is able to talk with a person that she’s only been able to talk to over tapes and the telephone for over ten years. She is able to strengthen the relationship that she has with Robert, making it strong enough to last yet another ten years.

Robert also cures the husband’s emotional problem of joking about offensive things. Robert doesn’t take offense to the things that the husband says to him. When the husband says, “Which side of the train did you sit on by the way?” Robert doesn’t respond in anger like the wife does, he gives a response “Right side” (276). This teaches the husband that he can not offend Robert, and it makes the husband stop saying offensive things. Instead of being offensive the husband changes the way that he thinks after dealing with Robert for a while and instead tries to hold a conversation with him without being rude.

Cathedral is a short story about disabilities and how they can be overcome, both socially and emotionally. It is through the visit of Robert who is physically disabled, the

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emotionally and socially disabled husband and wife are able to receive help for their problems.

I should be writing but instead I found this

Google vid

They can try to take away my youtube on campus but I STILL HAVE MY GOOGLE!!!!

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6618277726999456662

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4335321683785010748

you have to see it to believe it

I didnt think that you would believe me if i told you this, and i wanted you to get the full aspect of how funny this actually is. The photo below is the money bags for our work, since we take in money we have to take the money to the bank, how sunrise used to do it... well this is what i saw and had to share!!

Thats right, we take FOOD STAMPS!!!!!!

so i was at work...

so i was sitting at work reading this magazine, i turned to tell jocelyn something, but when i turned i felt some resistance and i thought i hit her with the magazine, and then she kind of grabbed her arm where i thought i had hit her, i said "oh i'm sorry did i hit you?" and she said...

"no i just spit on myself."

thought you would enjoy that fun little excitement of my tuesday
talk to you later!

70 out of 75

Remember that crazy poetry test that everyone is supose to fail?

Well... I got a 70 out of 75 on it.

The average for the class was a 51.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That is all. Pictures will be uploaded when I make it to the dungeon of the book balancing competition.

code words.....

....cat liter....

Youtube Classics

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3b8G8delDlk SHOOT HIM IN THE HEAD!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcz-vgs-j0U
Bobble head

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Du4jDIUuvDs
just because

And now a quick segment from the East Coast...

DON'T FALL ASLEEP! WE'RE EVERYWHERE!

YOU'RE NOT SAFE!!!

Stop thinking that you're safe, just because you dno't live in the same state as one of the two fat kids, doesn't mean that we can't get you!

And then for those kids that are interested, me spinning fire, unedited and in the park. Enjoy http://s224.photobucket.com/albums/dd29/fatkidsquared/?action=view&current=PICT0137.flv